Let me tell you there's nothing like having your tits cut off your body to make you rethink your femininity. Sorry to really clog up the feed with the cancer business but it's really all my content atm if you take out weird shit my children do and trying to make funny television.
Since the second I found out I had BC I have been flooded with female support. Flowers, cards, gifts babysitting, cleaning and wine: really if you take the cancer away it's a bloody good time.
Not so long ago I didn't realise the benefit of having a close group of female friends. (Lucky I timed it well for the ole' illness call up though hey?) I never had sisters and so I didn't realise the truly special bond you can share with women in your life. I also chose not to let women in. To be brave is to be guarded and to be strong is to keep going without any help. So I am seldom vulnerable because of course to be vulnerable is to be exposed.
I began compiling beautiful friends from different places and putting them into my life with great respect and admiration. Keeping adult friendships is like juggling a puzzle but luckily a lot of them live elsewhere so I can maintain online and still look like a really present person. I hate phone calls and seldom Facetime so my friends have handled me with grace, but I always promised to make up for it in witty banter, educated responses and occasional good advice that ends in "But idk, whatever you think is best" to immediately negate any poor suggestions. Overall, the most important thing I have learnt is to be the best damn friend I can possibly by to some truly fabulous souls. And I hope that I do, every day.
I show up. I always show up. And so low and behold that's what those MFs did for me. They showed up in droves! I couldn't get rid of them. They were in my home, in my hospital... They were going around me at times! Calling husband, checking with hospital staff (Robina hospital surgical ward, angels) there was a spreadsheet involved and decorations and a fundraiser (that fundraiser bought my wig so I shall accept it graciously).I had food I didn't even need and pyjamas I certainly did need. They came to my side when I needed them and I appreciated every damn annoying smothered vulnerable second of it. They were my tribe of women, my sisters, I had beautifully created for myself.
My friends helped give my children a Christmas when I was in hospital -
They babysat -
They helped prepare for a shitty season -
And enjoyed a not as shitty as we thought season -
And there was CREATIVITY and FUNNY WOMEN -
Sometimes I feel I don't deserve so much love BUT I know I would give it back in DROVES to each of the fabulous women I call friends.
So, on this International Women's Day 2021 I impart this to you: do not take your female relationships lightly. Build them up, support each other, back each other, nourish each other. Because we are here for the lols and we are here for the small things but lemme tell you, when those big things come knocking you're gonna want those crazy, love giving, oxygen smugglers <3